The video is finally here. After almost a year since we shot it, GIMME WHAT I WANT is live on YouTube, and honestly, I’m nervous about how people will react.
Watching the final cut for the first time was surreal. Seeing yourself make choices you’d never make in real life, exploring emotions you hope you never have to feel – it’s unsettling in the best way. Art should disturb sometimes.
The most challenging part wasn’t the filming itself, but living with this story for months during post-production. Every time the director sent new cuts, I had to revisit that headspace. The editing process became almost therapeutic – turning raw emotion into something with meaning.
What strikes me most about the finished video is how quiet the most powerful moments are. The director understood that real devastation happens in silence, not in screaming. The most intense scenes barely have any sound at all.
The color palette tells its own story. Everything starts warm and familiar, then gradually becomes colder and more isolated. By the end, the world feels completely drained of color – which perfectly matches the emotional journey.
Moscow looks different in this video. The city becomes this maze where every turn leads you further from safety. We shot in locations that most people pass by without noticing, but through the camera they become significant, almost threatening.
This video forced me to confront questions about revenge, justice, and what people are capable of when they feel completely powerless. Heavy themes, but the song demanded nothing less.
The response has been intense. Some people find it too dark, others say it’s the most honest thing I’ve ever made. Both reactions feel right.
Watch GIMME WHAT I WANT
Sometimes art needs to go where life hopefully never will.
— Indie pop artist, musician Anastasia Ledovskaya